Well...... Today my sis came back.. I'm happy shes back.. after awhile shes not here i feel awfully bad.. i missed her.. wonder how am i gona do wihtout her in my future.. i gota let go afterall.. we're just growing..sighs... Growing eh.. tmr im turning 18..when i was 14 i was excited abt being it.. last months back i was happy im gona be 18..(with all tht stupid ridiculous thoughts i had, smoking , drinking, clubbing and all that.. which is no longer valid in any space of my brain now.. ) im upset im gona be 18... I'm older.. more responsibilities..... well not tht i can't handle... i could but i wish i dont have to.. it's too all of a sudden thing... ive been taken care off by so many ppl, dad, bro, sis, aunt.. and im off the resp.

i know tht's bad.. i gota be independent afterall.. now that im no kid anymore.. SIGHS KIDSHOOD I MISS U BADLY. and ah... the same time.. i'm sad sudenly.. the Emo blood rushed in like never b4.. i watched the korean dvd i bought..and it's too sweet... The guy.... The love.. geee making me so lonely like never b4.......sad birthday eh.. I just missed the time i'm with someone.. Who hugs me,kissed me, sms me b4 my sleep.. Sms me when i woke up... Cares abt me, loves me, fondles me.. And all of that... Well im glad ive no strings attached... But at the same time i feel fuked up having none.. :( i wonder why am i feeling like this.. Though many friends i have... I still feel they cant be like a special someone i described earlier on.. HOW HORRIBLE.. i hate this feelings alot.. i've been into this once.. but it was only for awhile.. cause someone appeared out of a sudden.. and bcame mine.. Well i gota let this feelings go afterall.. :) i gota be happy with what i have.. i know theres a time for everything .. a time to posses and a time to let go.. :) and i know my time will come =) Well.. Happy birthday to me :)